Throughout my career I have found that most people are reluctant to ask for help. I will add that I was one of these people, even though I didn't realize it at the time.
So why are we so reluctant to ask for help?
I recently asked one of my team this same question and the answer was one that I suspect many people would give. He said that he felt like he should know everything and by not knowing what to do he was showing a weakness. Does this sound familiar?
An interesting fact regarding the answer above, is that this gentleman wants to become a trainer, so I followed up by asking him what he would think if his students didn't ask for help when they didn't know the answer? I could sense the cogs going in his mind and he gained a new perspective.
The truth is, we are not expected to know everything. I teach that we should learn something every day and if we already know everything this wouldn't be possible.
Growth is a journey that takes time. It is not always easy and sometimes it...
How do you determine whether you are receiving criticism or advice?
There are a few factors involved in this process and the first one starts with your own mindset.
If you mindset is closed to ideas, what you hear will always be criticism. When your mindset is open to criticism, you will be open to hear advice. I include this statement in my overarching theory that you should have a growth mindset as when you do it allows for constant learning and sharing of ideas.
Another factor to bear in mind is who the comment is coming from. Are they someone who is constantly finding fault and only provides a problem, never a solution? In this case it is probably criticism that you are receiving. If, on the other hand, this is someone that you trust, someone who always has your back and provides solutions rather than problems, you are probably receiving advice.
The moral - maintain a growth mindset, associate with the right people and be open to criticism.
As I walked the dogs this morning a thought popped into my head that I wanted to share with you.
We are all affected by our environment and being aware of this can help put things into perspective. I walk the dogs on a trail by our house every day that backs onto Lake Apopka. The lake is huge and I often marvel at how different it looks, based on the weather.
This morning was a beautiful calm day with hardly a cloud in the sky. As a result the lake looked like glass. Later today it will almost certainly be stormy here in Florida and as a result the lake will look completely different.
My point is this: The lake remains the same yet it's appearance changes and therefore so will people's perception of it. We are the same. If we are in a negative environment, the chances are higher that we will become negative ourselves so choose your environment.
You are the Captain of your soul, the master of your fate.
What do you think the missing word is in the statement: Sometimes you win, sometimes you .......?
Conventional thinking would say "Lose" but in the world of John Maxwell we say "Learn". This is a mindset change and one that I believe everyone should adopt. We learn from our mistakes and therefore we should see failure as a learning opportunity - in other words a good thing.
I know, you are probably shouting out "What?, you are seriously saying that failure is a good thing?"
Yes, I am. I believe that if you don't fail you are not trying hard enough. This is part of my philosophy about having a Growth mindset rather than the traditional Goal mindset. We should be looking to grow and learn every day, pushing ourselves and our limits in order to achieve things most people don't believe are possible.
You can find out more by joining my online course, Your Third Quarter, where I talk about this in more detail.
Do you have a plan for you personal growth?
A few years ago, like most people, my answer to this question was "No, what are you talking about?"
You see I thought that hard work and effort alone would get me the things that I wanted. The truth is, it doesn't. This is why a lot of people are in a rut, stuck doing something they don't really enjoy, wondering when their next "break" is going to come along, thinking that if they work harder, work longer, things will get better.
They key to moving upwards is personal growth so I ask again, "Do you have a plan for your personal growth?"
If you don't, like most people, it is OK. The good news is that it is never too late!
Take me, for example. I was 50 when I finally realized that I could take control of my life and my destiny if I truly wanted to find happiness. I will tell you more about my own journey in my program: Your Third Quarter. Suffice to say, I turned my life around by becoming intentional about my actions. I moved from a goal...
Do you know what the opposite of decision making is?
Procrastination! The habit of putting things off to another time is not only the opposite of decision making, it is also the killer of dreams!
Why do we end to procrastinate? I believe it can be overcome by understanding our purpose, vision and strategy. This may sound simple, and it is.
When you know what you end objective is and why it is important to you, it becomes easier to learn prioritizing and scheduling skills. These are the key to eliminating procrastination because you know why it is important to complete these tasks that may not be your favorite and would previously have been put off.
If you want to know more about overcoming procrastination by identifying your purpose, vision and strategy, you can join me in "Your Third Quarter" where I show you a way to start a new life towards freedom.
I live in Florida and at this time of year we have afternoon storms every day. Even though this is a well-known fact and it happens every year, I am still surprised when people complain about it. Don't get me wrong, I am not a fan of storms myself so why am I surprised?
We all have a choice in how we live our lives, so we should take responsibility and make decisions that are right for us. If we do not do so then we have no one to blame but ourselves. The surprising thing is that most people don't do this and I have made it my mission to help people to discover their purpose in life so that they can make the right decisions for them.
Once you have identified your purpose you are then in a position to clarify your destination - your dream. These are the starting points and once defined, and only then, you can start to work out how to move forward - your strategy.
Have you ever heard of the expression: You have 2 of these and 1 of these, use them in that proportion?
I can't remember exactly when I first heard this although I know it was during my time in retail sales in the UK. In case you haven't heard it, allow me to explain the context behind the saying.
The 2 that is being referred to are your ears and the 1 is your mouth. You see a lot of people, especially sales people, have a tendency to speak before they have listened to what the other person really needs. They either assume they know the answer or they simply do not care as they are consumed with their own self importance and agenda.
So my message today is a simple one: listen to gain understanding before opening your mouth and offering a solution.
I see a lot of people that live in a reactive state - that respond to issues and challenges when they arise. I prefer to be proactive and look for potential obstacles and challenges in advance so that I can find ways to overcome them BEFORE they happen.
Being reactive, or firefighting, is a major cause of stress and since I moved to a proactive state of mind I have noticed that my stress levels have reduced significantly.
I find that it is common practice to start moving before gaining a complete understanding of the reason for the action. What a lot of people also fail to determine before moving is what they want the end result to look like. Sounds crazy doesn't it but look at what is happening in your own workplace and take note of what you see.
My programs work on a simple, yet very effective, 3-step process: