This quote from Esther Perel arrived in my email this morning: "Self-esteem is the ability to see yourself as a flawed individual and still hold yourself in high regard"
This was interesting to me because most people who see themselves as flawed do not hold themselves in high regard, hence the trend towards depression and anxiety. Accepting that you are not perfect is an essential component of growing. I don't want to burst your bubble but "Perfection does not exist" so stop beating yourself up for not achieving it!
I do believe, however, that you should be pursuing constant improvement and to do this you need to continue to grow and learn every day. This could be through books, podcasts, articles etc. but it can also be through your own experiences. In fact, I would go so far as to say it SHOULD be through your own experiences more than anything else because they are real to you and tangible.
If you haven't read my thoughts on daily reflection I highly recommend that you do so....
What is your most valuable possession?
Many of you will be thinking about the thing that you own which has the most monetary value or is the dearest thing to your heart, as I did when I first heard this question.
In fact, your most valuable possession is the next 24 hours that you have in front of you. I will take this a stage further and add, it is what you do with it that makes it even more valuable.
I use a saying a lot in my teaching: You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink! I believe that we all have an enormous amount of untapped potential that resides in our subconscious mind, waiting to be released. I can help by providing the tools but I cannot make you pick them up and start using them (metaphorically speaking of course).
The same is true of the next 24 hours: it exists for all us but how many will be intentional about maximizing that time and making the most of every minute to do good? Sadly, the answer is not many and that is why I created my programs,...
I am sure, as I have, that you have noticed certain people who like to talk about doing things but never actually do them, right? They exist everywhere, and that led me to think about the saying: Actions speak louder than words.
I was reminded of this as I completed my daily study of Napoleon Hill's, Think and Grow Rich, this morning. Hill writes: "Tell the world what you intend to do but first show it." He is right,l and let me ask you this; what are you doing to show the world your intentions?
John Maxwell uses a phrase that can be used to describe the same thing: You cannot give what you do not have. When John said this he maybe didn't mean it in this context but, for me, it fits perfectly. You have to be able to demonstrate you have knowledge and understanding of a subject before the world will listen to you about it.
Actions speak louder than words so go out and show the world what you intend to do, get good at it, and others will follow you.
Life throws distractions at us from time to time. You understand what I am saying, I am sure that you have experienced these too, right?
I had an example of this yesterday when my normal routine was disrupted by a number of things. We were expecting visitors from out of town and the expected arrival time was mid afternoon. I had my day all planned out with my normal morning routine of studying, drinking my coffee, walking the dogs then getting my own breakfast.
At around 6am I received a call telling me out guests were about an hour away - routine out of the window. I jumped out of bed, had a quick cup of coffee then took the dogs for their walk. As I returned to the house our guests were pulling up. Stay calm, this is all OK, I was telling myself.
I went into the house and turned a light on but nothing. What was wrong? I tried a few other lights and nothing. I looked at the DVR player and no clock. I realized that the power was out - another distraction!
Everything turned out fine...
I love talking about leadership and how you determine a great leader versus an average one. Some people think that a great leader is one who comes up with all of the ideas and tells people how to do things. Personally, I believe that a great leader encourages others to come up with the ideas and creates an environment where this is possible, even encouraged.
When you nurture an environment where ideas thrive it encourages people to look for solutions instead of bringing problems forward all of the time. When people have ideas and see these being accepted it gives them a sense of pride and ownership. This, in turn, will produce far better results than merely telling people what to do and expecting them to run with it.
Think about your environment, both at home and at work, and ask yourself whether it is one that encourages new ideas?
Have you ever noticed that when you are confident that you can achieve something, you usually do?
I have observed this in myself and in other people too. So why do you think this is? The power of our minds is incredible and, as I have said on many occasions, we use less than 10% of it's potential. There is another saying that "When you put your mind to it you can achieve anything" so it is no secret the power that our minds hold.
My follow up question is: If we know our minds have this potential, why do we not use it?
I used to think it was because of a fear of failure but we already established that if we are confident of success it will come so there must be something deeper. Fear of criticism from others is definitely a factor and the other could be a lack of confidence which in turn will bring on a fear of failure.
Ultimately I believe that the answer lies within us. We need to believe that we are great, we can achieve anything, and find the confidence to break free of our...
When I was a child growing up in England there was a common saying: Life begins at 40!
I remember when I was approaching 40 this gave me a sense of excitement, almost as if something was going to happen by magic - and nothing happened!
So what does this popular saying mean? I have been thinking about this a lot recently and it has prompted me to design a new program: "Your Third Quarter". My conclusion is that we are at the half-way stage of our lives so, much like any sports game, we should review what has happened in the first half and plan how we are going to approach the rest of our life to maximize it.
American football and basketball games are broken into quarters so when we reach 40-something we are essentially starting our third quarter. When you look at the most successful teams they generally have an outstanding third quarter as this sets up the final quarter. Life is the same, Your Third Quarter is the set up to retirement so make the most of it and don't live in regret....
"The fruit of the tree is always on the limb" - John C. Maxwell
What do you think of when John says this? He used this on his "Minute with Maxwell" focused on the word "Risk".
If you want to get on in life you will need to take risks. These should be calculated risks where you have thought through the benefits before acting. If you want to climb the ladder you have to take your foot off the first rung to move to the second and third. John uses a baseball analogy to say that you cannot get to second base without taking your foot off first.
If you risk nothing, you will receive nothing, and then wonder why you have nothing. I see too many people that are waiting for their "lucky break" or for someone to hand them their next opportunity on a silver platter - news flash.......THAT WON'T HAPPEN!!
Take some time to reflect on your life, what have do you want to do with your future? What makes you happy?
I am here to help and have programs that will enable you to identify your "why" and...
In Think and Grow Rich Napoleon Hill writes: "Thousands of men and women carry inferiority complexes with them all through life, because some well-meaning, but ignorant person destroyed their confidence through opinions or ridicule"
This is not always intentional behavior on the other persons behalf, it could be a sign of their own insecurity or fear of failure. Many people do not want others to succeed as it makes them feel inadequate in their own achievements. On the face of it you may think this is harsh, but think about it for a moment. When was the last time that someone discouraged you, or you discouraged someone else, from trying something out of the ordinary? What was the reason for this discouragement?
Hill also writes: "If you are influenced by "opinions" when you reach decisions, you will not succeed in any undertaking, much less in that of transmuting your own desire into money".
I will add that you can change the word money to your goal or ambition as not all of you...
You are just one idea away........from being able to live a life of freedom and happiness.
The best ideas are ones that are born from personal experiences. This means that we all have the capability to have an idea that can change our lives. The two keys are recognizing the idea for what it is and secondly, acting on that idea and turning it into reality.
I am sure, like me, that you can think back to many times in your life when a thought came into your mind - something like: Wouldn't it be good if..... or I would love to be able to.....
I want you to promise yourself that next time you have such a thought or idea, you take action and turn it into something real. It doesn't have to be something that will change the course of humanity. It could be something small like getting up 30 minutes earlier every day to read. The important thing is that you act on the idea and turn it into reality.
Once you start it opens the flood gates more ideas will start to flow from your mind and when...