Today I am asking a straight forward question that you may, or may not, have an answer for: "What do you want from your life?"
If you have been following my journey you know that I am a firm believer in the fact that YOU control your destiny and fate. Yes, there are outside factors that exist but ultimately you can control those. Too many people are waiting for their "lucky break" or "the right time" or they feel that they are "entitled" to a promotion because they have been in their position for a long time.
Basically this is a sign of limiting beliefs plus a lack of taking responsibility and ownership for your life.
So I ask you again: What do you want from your life?
The follow up question, once you have answered the first one, is: What are you going to do about it?
Thirdly, and possibly most importantly: When are you going to start?
There is no time like the present, if you don't believe me refer to this ancient Chinese proverb:
“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years...
I remember when I was growing up in England that people would say "Life begins at 40". At the time I thought this was so far in the future that it was not relevant. As I approached 40 my life was not going as I intended. I had been successful at work but my personal life was a mess. I was so excited to see what this new life would be when I hit this magical age of 40!
Low and behold, nothing changed so what was all the hype about? I was waiting for something to happen as no-one had said that you need to do anything yourself. In the modern world I think that 50 is the new 40 but even then it is us that needs to take control and make a difference - there is no magic formula!
When I realized this it really did start to change my life. I began to think about what was truly important to me, I identified my "why" and then used that to formulate a plan for success. This is an essential part on living a new life that can lead to fulfillment and happiness. Your life does change in mid-life...
Have you ever wondered why you wake up during the night and yet when the alarm goes of and you hit "snooze" you feel tired all day?
I did, and then recently I read some facts that helped to explain this. I learned that we have sleep cycles which last about 90 minutes and repeat several times throughout the night. Each cycle consists of a light sleep, followed by a deep sleep and then a dream state. The interesting thing is that there is also a sleep cycle alarm clock built into our brain. This puts us into a wake up phase ranging from 30-minutes to 2-hours before our individual sleep cycle has tracked our normal wake up time - fascinating right?
When you hit the snooze button and roll back over to sleep some more, you are actually resetting your sleep cycle and therefore your brain is telling your body that you have another 90 minutes of sleep to come. When you get up at the next alarm you will feel tired because your body is expecting to be asleep for another 80 minutes or so -...
Napoleon Hill wrote: Tell the world what you intend to do, but first show it.
The context around this statement in Think and Grow Rich was regarding not disclosing information about your ideas in case other people stole them before you could put them into action. I want to take it a stage further and relate it to the "Walk the walk, don't just talk the talk" concept.
Too many people talk about what they want to do or wish they could do and yet never take action. Later in life these same people will bemoan their "bad luck", or lack of a "lucky break" when the truth is, all they had to do was take action on their idea - in other words show the world what they intended to do instead of merely tell them about it.
This is a symptom of entitlement and wanting things to drop into our lap rather than being prepared to earn the right to something by working for it. Don't be one of those people. Take the bull by the horns and follow your dream with a passion and desire that will carry you...
"Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects" - Dalai Lama.
I often hear people say that what they do has no effect, they are just one person so what difference does it make! This is far from the truth as the Dalai Lama states in his quote above.
There is a law of cause and effect which states that: for every effect there is a definite cause. We may not realize or be aware of the effect our actions have but it is also true that for every reaction there is an equal and opposite reaction.
I talked previously about change and how we should make small changes in order to instigate the big changes in life. This is also referring to the ripple effect where each of those small changes adds up and creates the big change. Ripples are happening all around us. If you get up 5 minutes late in the morning what happens? Your whole day is affected by that simple 5 minutes.
I encourage you to put the ripple effect...
When I was in Sales, one of my Managers once told me: Your have 2 ears and 1mouth, use them in that proportion.
He was referring to the art of active listening and using that to understand what the customer needed rather than wanted. I have used this philosophy ever since, not just in the sales world, in everything that I do. Have I always been successful? No, but when I catch myself not doing this I remember those words and get back on track.
As I study the chapter on "Decisions" in Napoleon Hill's book, Think and Grow Rich, these words came back to me again. In this chapter Hill talks about how successful people have the habit of making decisions promptly and changing them slowly. He goes on to add to: "Let one of your first decisions be to keep a closed mouth and open eyes and ears".
Hill is suggesting that we should not let ourselves be influenced by others as, if we do so, we will have no desire of our own and, therefore, are less likely to be successful. Close friends and...
I think we can all agree that getting people to change, including ourselves, can be hard - right?
The fact remains that change is the one constant in our lives. Everything changes and, let's be fair, if has to if we want to keep improving. If things didn't change we would all be running around in loin cloths hunting for our food!
When faced with a major change the best technique that I have found is to make small changes first. These small changes add up to big changes over time and get people used to change.
The other, and most important thing, is to explain the "why" behind the change so that everyone can buy into it and understand the reasons. I find that when people see the bigger picture they are far more likely to embrace the change.
People are resistant to change because it is taking them out of their comfort zone into an unknown world. Be sensitive to this and tell them why the change is necessary, what the big picture is, how it will benefit them (we are all...
When most people think of a brand their mind immediately goes to a product or business. However, we all brand ourselves and it is this perception that dictates how other people view us, in the same way as we think about products.
Think about it for a minute: Why do some of us like Coca Cola and others prefer Pepsi? It may be down to the taste but it is probably more related to our perception of the branding. When a celebrity gets into trouble their sponsors invariably start to drop them. Why? Because it could hurt their brand. It has affected that celebrities brand, which is why the sponsors want to drop them and the public polarize on social media.
We may not be celebrities but we all have our brand and this should be protected and nurtured so that we can achieve what we want from life. So what is your brand? Is it portraying you as you would want or does it need revising?
What is the thing that gives you the most sense of fulfillment?
Take some time to think about this, don't just go with the first thing that pops into your head. Once you have identified this one thing, ask yourself why it gives you fulfillment. What is it about it that makes you feel happy?
You may need to keep asking why, in fact it is suggested that you go 7 layers deep with the "why" question and eventually you will find out the true reason and meaning.
Now that you have identified your "why", what are you going to do with that information? You should be using that new found realization to make sure that you are doing more of what you love, and less of what you don't.
Sounds simple right? That is because the steps are, it is carrying them out that is more painful and difficult but anything worthwhile is uphill so be persistent!
Let me start this blog post by asking you a question: What was the last major decision that you made?
We make decisions every day based on the choices that are presented to us but I am talking about a major decision that you made with a definite purpose to have an effect on your life.
I made one this week when I signed a contract to hold my first 2-day event on "Lessons On Leadership". I had been thinking about this for a short time and had researched the costs, options, and the interest from prospective attendees. I have a definite purpose as this is part of my plan to develop my business and mission: "To add value to other people so that they can become the best version of themselves".
A definite plan is essential in moving forward with purpose once a decision has been made and I have put that plan into action. Is it scary? Too right it is, but in a good way. I feel that I am taking control of my own life, I am influencing others to do the same, I am living my dream and you can...