It continues to amaze me just how many people say that they want to change their lives but they are waiting for the perfect time before taking action. If you want to make a difference in the future that lies ahead of you, it requires you to take different actions today.
The longer you wait to do something the greater the chances are that you will never do it. Think back through your life, can you identify times when you wanted to do something and waited for the perfect time?
The perfect time does not exist, this is just another form of procrastination which is the killer of dreams. The right time to do something is now, not later today, not tomorrow, not on Monday - right now!
The answer is to get started, put one foot in front of the other and move forward. The law of momentum will kick in and as you gain confidence your pace will increase until eventually, you will be flying.
Over the last year or so I have lost count of how many people have indicated that they are interested in growing themselves personally and professionally yet fail to take action when faced with the choice.
I have determined that the majority are looking for change yet are not prepared to change their actions to get it. The only theory that I can determine is that there is an inherent fear of failure and therefore a wish to stay with their self imposed comfort zone.
The simple fact remains, if you want different results tomorrow, you need to take different actions today! You need to start being the person that you want to become as waiting for it to happen on it's own is only going to lead to a life of disappointment.
Your time is now, so take action and take the life that you deserve and want. Don't live in fear of failure - live in fear of regret!
As a leader it is your responsibility to carry the load and encourage your followers to find their strengths, then stay within this strength zone and become the best they can be.
When I refer to a "Leader", I am talking about anyone that has influence over other people so that could be within your family, your friends, your colleagues at work, or your direct reports if you have them.
A leader should also understand their purpose and strive to be their best in everything they do, as it is this behavior that will lift up others around them.
So, what is your gift, what is your purpose, what is your strength, and are you living in these zones every day?
As I talk to more and more people I am finding a trend where we are worried about how others perceive us. I will tell you that you cannot control other people's perception and so the best thing to do is to concentrate on being yourself and following your values.
I had some questions about this on a recent Facebook live broadcast and on my radio show. The listeners were concerned about hurting other people if they followed their own dream. I answered by saying that if these people truly loved and cared for them, they would respect the decision and love them anyway.
My advice is always to live your own life, be yourself, and be the person you want to become.
On my radio show today I was talking about change and how habits dictate the results we obtain, either good or bad. One question I got from a listener was:
"How do you know what needs to change to get what you want?"
This is a great question and the answer is through your daily reflection. The change required may not be obvious at first because usually the root cause is buried, it is only the symptom that is on the surface.
Your daily reflection should include an honest look at what happened during that day and a review of what went well and what didn't go quite so well. Then you need to look deeper and answer what was the action that caused that result? You need to replicate the good actions and eliminate the bad ones. These are the things that need to change.
We all have expectations for the way our life should go, including how we feel other people should behave. How should we manage those expectations so as to avoid disappointment?
I expect a lot of myself and have had a tendency to judge other people by the same level. I have learned over the years that not everyone has the same expectations, behaviors, and desires so I have been disappointed on more than one occasion as a result.
This is why I have evolved from the "Golden Rule", treat others as you would want to be treated, to the "Platinum Rule", which says to treat others as THEY would expect to be treated. The difference is subtle, but at the same time it is huge as we are all different and what is expected for one person may not be for another.
This is a difficult skill to master, and one that will take constant use, and when you have it, you will make a difference to other people and feel a sense of value yourself.
There is a common belief that you learn more from your losses than you do your wins. While I believe it is important to learn from our losses and analyze what went wrong, I also believe that it is just as important to evaluate what went well and learn from that too.
Many people take wins and never reflect on why they won. When you can identify the successful components you will be able to replicate them in other actions that didn't go quite so well. You will also be able to see components that could have been improved, in turn making the experience even better.
In summary, reflect daily and review everything that happened during your day, both good and not so good.
I saw a saying today that said: The truth lies just beneath the surface. It got me thinking about how often we ask questions to make sure what we see on the surface is actually the correct information?
This applies to our personal and professional lives as what we see is not always what exists. The art of questioning is a skill that we are not taught, so how do we learn it?
I believe that this is an area where good leaders stand out - and when I say leaders this is not only at work. We are all leaders, where ever we are, because we influence other people, intentionally or not.
I have spoken to many leaders over the years who seem to think that loyalty is a right and should be expected from their team. This is not the case - loyalty is not a right, it needs to be earned.
Loyalty and respect go hand in hand as they are both earned based on your behavior and actions. People do what people see, so it is important to demonstrate the same behaviors that you are asking of your team.
"Do as I say, not as I do" is a saying that should be eliminated from any vocabulary as it is not a recipe for success. Why should anyone think it is OK to expect other people to behave in a different way from you?
Think about it from your own point of view: Who are you loyal to in your life and who has your respect, and then ask yourself why this is?
When you hear the term maturity, what do you think of? Most people believe this is something that is earned with age, but it is not necessarily so.
"Maturity is doing what you are supposed to be doing, when you're supposed to be doing it, no matter how you feel" - Dom Capers
Maturity comes as a result of the lessons we learn in life, whether they be form wins or from losses. Many people say that you learn from your losses, and this is true and it is just as important to be humble and learn from your victories too.
I wonder how many people spend as much time analyzing their wins as they do their losses? If we do this we will continue to grow and develop - this is the definition of maturity in my eyes.